Guess What? Chicken Butt!!

In today's post I have to tell a story of a conversation Nicole and I had the other day. I have a hard time getting Nicole's true emotion in writing, but I'll try. This one's just too funny not to share!

So last week I decided to make homemade chicken noodle soup. Nicole was at the kitchen table doing her school work and I was standing at the sink rinsing off a whole chicken, removing the giblets and all that fun stuff. Nicole looks up at me and asks, "Are you sticking your hand in a chicken's butt?"

Now this comment was not made by her to be funny, she was very serious. So I looked up at her and told her, "Yes, I have to take out the giblets and rinse the chicken off before I cook it. What's the big deal, its dead?” (This is me trying to be funny with her, but she was not amused).

Nicole looks at me dead serious and says, "That is disgusting! (With an emphasis on DIS) If you have to stick your hand up a chickens butt to cook, then when I get older my husband is doing all the cooking. I am NOT putting my hands inside a chicken." Now as she’s telling me all of this, her hand is on one hip and she’s staring at me with a look of revulsion.

So now I tell her, "They've all ready removed all the guts and the actual chicken's butt. It’s just the bones, meat and skin." She replies, "That's even more disgusting and I’m not eating the chicken soup anymore.”

At this point I'm completely amused by this conversation and her very serious face. It’s taking all I have not to bust up laughing because she is so appalled by this situation. So I respond, "What do you think hot dogs are made of?" I can’t contain myself anymore and burst out laughing.

While still giggling, I tell her hot dogs are made out of all the leftovers of different animals...the lips and assholes. Now she really freaks out and is not amused at all but outright disgusted. She then proceeds to tell me that she is “never eating another hot dog ever again, she's not eating the chicken soup and she can not believe how disgusting this all is”. (I'm really starting to think that she is soon going to be a vegetarian...)

Now this is the end of our conversation, but the story doesn't end here. For dinner that night it was either chicken soup or cook your own dinner. Nathan decides to have hot dogs and chips instead of soup. He heats up his hot dogs and sits down at the kitchen table. Nicole looks at him, dead serious and says, "If you knew what was in those, you wouldn't be eating them right now."

Now Nathan freaks out, not because of how hot dogs are made, but because he now thinks that Nicole has put something into his hot dogs. He comes running into the other room where I am, and he’s crying and telling me what Nicole said to him. I ask him if he knows what hot dogs are made with. He says yeah, the leftovers, and I tell him that's what Nicole was talking about. So now Nathan looks at me, completely irritated and says, "Great, now I threw my hot dogs away for nothing because I thought Nicole put something in them. Now I have to cook new ones."

I love these kids for making me laugh daily!!

I'm sure this story doesn't come out quite as good as it would have if I were able to tell you in person with facial expressions and all...actually when I told my mom the story, I was laughing so hard half way through it that I could barely finish. Nicole, true to her word, hasn't touched a hot dog since and she did not eat the chicken soup either...